Sometimes, what happens in the dark, doesn't stay in the dark.
Here's a small piece of what's been floating in my head today. It's the
start of something or the end of it. Depends on your point of view. - CAG
When I first woke up, I could
hear its panicked breath. It was the kind of breathing you do when you’re
having a bad dream and the monster almost gets you but you wake up just in
time. I woke up the same way. No light. None. I scuttled
backward until my back hit the wall then stood up, ready to fight. But
the fight never came. I waited in the silence; sometimes holding my
breath so I could listen. I knew it was doing the same. It spoke to
me in some language I didn't understand in a voice I didn't recognize.
The voice was garbled. I couldn't tell if it was a man or a woman
or even human. Then something clicked, I don’t know what but suddenly, I
understood it.
“Who are you?” he demanded. It was a man. Immediately, I wanted to
spit out an angry reply. Old memories flooded back of the last time I was
trapped in a dark room with a man. What he had done to me. How he
had hurt me. Over and over again. I nearly died. I was never the
same since. That was never going to happen again. Never.
I would have answered but then
I realized that I didn't know who I was. How was that possible? I
couldn't think of my name. My knees almost buckled at the onslaught of
that realization. I shook my head and pulled myself back into the moment.
I could figure all that other shit out later. I answered his
question with one of my own. “Who are you?” The silence was broken
by rapid breathing. His and mine.
“I don’t know.” The reply was a
mixture of fear and acceptance. I kept my back to the wall, slowly and
quietly, I took a step to my right, walking the perimeter; softly tapping the
wall. Searching for a breach, for a way out. A door. A
weapon. I wanted a weapon. I didn't need one. I could fight
to the death if I had to. But a weapon would give me a nice advantage.
I didn't know who I was trapped in
here with or who would be waiting for me once I found my way out of here.
I was going to get out of here. My gun was gone and I left my knife
embedded in the chest of the man who attacked me in the alley. I could
feel him behind me; in the shadows. He was as blind as I was and just as
wary of me as I was of him. Good.
*********
Sometimes, I need to bounce story ideas off of
friends to see if it works from a technical stand point or if it reads
realistically enough to be what I intended it to be. There are times when
I just want to share what’s going on in my head. It may be the start of a
story, a scene or two from a story that I’m already working on or just a flash
of something going on in my writer’s realm. This morning I was “hit” with
this little piece of inspiration and shared it with my good friend Ed Maisonet,
who is also my LifeDefense Instructor. He replied with this:
"Be what you need to be in the moment. Head not the tail.
Predator not prey."
How true those words are. They brought to mind
what Ed teaches in every class and that is, every person should know how to
protect themselves, especially women. Some of the female characters I
write about start off their literary lives as prey. They don’t always
remain that way though. More often than not, they are compelled by
circumstances and survival instincts to fight when running to safety is no
longer an option and giving up is definitely not the plan. They learn
what they have to learn and do what is necessary to become the predator and not
the prey. This holds true in the real world as well.
Please understand, I am not man-bashing, the same
idea of being prepared to defend yourself applies to men and children as
well. Trouble arrives uninvited in many
forms and can be delivered to anyone at any time. All one has to do is pick up a newspaper or
watch the news to see just how many men, women and children fall prey to violent
acts all the time, day or night, while they’re at work or school and even when
they’re home. Some of us have already
been a victim of violence. Women and
children are commonly thought of as “weaker” targets. I wonder how many would be alive today if
they had the advantage of knowing how to defend themselves from the bad guys
that prowl our streets and break into our homes.
I've been taking Ed’s class for some time now and
while I am in no way near to being like the bad-ass protagonists of many of my stories
(I’m a work in progress), I no longer feel as though I would be helpless in a
dire situation. If I could offer advice specifically
to women today, it would be:
·
Learn how to protect yourself.
There are ways to fend off your attacker. Find a good self-defense class and
train. Personally, I recommend Krav Maga
but find what works for you. With
commitment, you’ll also gain the side benefit of getting into shape and feeling
empowered mentally, spiritually as well as physically. I know I have.
·
Be cautious of who you let into your life. Take your time to
learn more about the person you’re going on a date with, regardless of how good
they look. That adage about wolves in
sheep’s clothing holds truth.
·
Think smart, act smarter and learn how to fight so you can live to
fight another day.
Just a few things I've learned from a 250 pound man,
that makes sense. Thanks Ed. As Ed would
say “See you on the mat.”
